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Ricky Wang's avatar

"My dad was a whole person, with a life, before and after me, and outside of me" — that line stopped me.

I've been circling that same realization with my own mom, who has Alzheimer's. I never really got the chance to know her as a full adult before the disease took hold, so I've spent the last few years piecing her together from old letters, photos, and secondhand stories the way you describe finding your father's letter.

It's strange and moving to discover a parent as a person separate from the role they played in your life — and a little heartbreaking that it so often takes losing them, in one way or another, to go looking.

Rachel Ooi's avatar

Yes, sometimes life moves in strange ways. But I'm glad you're able to piece the stories together. They are precious things, keep them close ❤️

Miao's avatar

It's my birthday today, and I feel like stumbling into this post of yours is my Dad sending me a greeting from heaven or wherever he is now. Thank you for sharing! <3

Rachel Ooi's avatar

This warms my heart ❤️

Rachel Ooi's avatar

And happy birthday!!

suansita خوري's avatar

That's so lovely and special that you have a letter from your dad to your mum! My parents have never been affectionate with each other and it's so hard to imagine them ever having been romantic in any way😅 Maybe I'll ask them if they ever wrote to each other ...

Rachel Ooi's avatar

It's as romantic as it is practical since back then there was no email yet :)

Sarah Li-Cain's avatar

I think because of your presence in their life, and the many ways they will know you (and continue to), I'm sure they'll feel the magic if they ever stumble upon your letters♥️

Rachel Ooi's avatar

I would love that ❤️