9 Comments
User's avatar
Joel Wisniewski's avatar

Fascinating! There is much to unpack here. I will have to re-read and take a closer look - at myself.

Expand full comment
Rachel Ooi's avatar

It is quite a bit to unpack. Remember, be kind and patient with yourself! ❤️

Expand full comment
Jamal Robinson's avatar

One, this is a beautiful piece ❤️

Two, I am awestruck at how similar our remembering of our youth were based on these words and my most recent piece:

"I was reprimanded for crying as a child. It was seen as a weakness, as something that made others uncomfortable..."

Feels surreal and like solidarity.

Expand full comment
Rachel Ooi's avatar

In solidarity, we stand; in tears, we embrace.

Expand full comment
Peck Gee Chua's avatar

Rachel, Thanks for sharing! Parenting is hard. As someone who is still and like quiet times to myself, I still don’t know how to manage my active two girls. Definitely has its ups and downs so enjoy the journey.

Expand full comment
Rachel Ooi's avatar

Parenting is a test for everyone. I, for one, cannot stand the noise if it gets too much for too long. I've now bought a set of earplugs which I can wear to reduce the noise, but I can still hear and communicate. Maybe you can get a spot in the house and let them know that this is where Mama takes her quiet time, and when you're there, they should leave you in peace. Depending on your children's age, it might start with only 2 minutes, but we can build it up from there. Good luck!

Expand full comment
Peck Gee Chua's avatar

Interesting! It's good to learn different techniques. I like your idea of a set routine or a set space for peace. My girls are 10 and 5. They have a love hate relationship and we find them fighting for the same things often. We do everything our own without much help so evenings and weekends are the busiest. I've never felt so light in a long time when I traveled without them early this year.

Expand full comment
Rachel Ooi's avatar

I hear you. We are mostly without help, too, but once in a while, when the grandparents come to help, it is such a gift. So I feel you! You're doing great, Mama. Let's normalize that Mama needs time and space, too, that she's her own person, too! I also traveled for the first time last summer without my kids. I was initially disoriented by the freedom, but then I quickly embraced it, and it was one of the best breaks I've had in a long time.

Expand full comment
Peck Gee Chua's avatar

Thanks much, Rachel! Cheering on you too.

Expand full comment